Big Girl Panties

OK does anyone hate the word "panties" as much as I do?  I don't know what it is but I've always hated that word...it just has this weird connotation and just sounds so...awful.  Ha!  Total fingernails on chalkboard for me...Hubs always teases me by saying it over and over and making my skin crawl.  Monkey. 

Anyways...this week I ended up putting my big girl panties on (ugh) and...wait for it...went to the gym to work out by myself for the first time EVER.  I know!!  Crazy, right?  As I've mentioned previously, I have a horrible fear of the gym and am so intimidated, particularly when it comes to doing weights.  I have nightmares of making an idiot of myself, but one of the reasons why I wanted to work with a personal trainer was so I would learn how to use the equipment properly, and figure how to set it up myself.  My trainer and I have had a few scheduling conflicts so there's a two week break where we won't be meeting, and I figured you know what...I'm just going to bite the bullet and go to the gym on my own so I don't totally lose what we've worked together to build.  Of course I chose a Friday night because it's pretty quiet at that time, Hubs was out playing hockey anyways and there's not a lot of people around to see me make a fool out of myself.  I was actually a little surprised at how many people there were actually, as I expected to be the only one there...there were a fair number of young guys working out and I kept thinking OK...I'm old, well past my bar star days and have nothing else better to do on a Friday night but come on!  Shouldn't you young bucks be hanging out at the bars cruising chicks?  Anyways...I went through as many of the exercises that I could do that didn't require a spotter, and I didn't increase the weights too much as Graham wasn't there to watch my form or assist if I needed it.  One funny thing though...I wanted to try the deadlifts on my own but couldn't actually lift the trap bar out of the stand it was on...it's not that heavy at 55 pounds, but it was awkward to lift out of the holder because I'm so short.  I attempted it twice and tried to look nonchalant when I couldn't get it out, all the while furtively looking around to see if anyone could see my failed attempts.  Trap bar fail undetected.  Whew.

So...pretty proud of myself that I went there and got 'er done.  Big girl panties solidly on.